Femdom Lifestyle

A blog devoted to analyze and celebrate the lifestyle of the female led relationship. It is open to discussions and stories from readers and other bloggers. Please submit your stories, ideas, photos, videos and/or discussions.
All will be posted as long as they fit the discussion and do not violate any laws.
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The Many Aspects of Sexual Female Domination

Femdom is all about putting the woman first; and the Femdom lifestyle now permeates every aspect of…

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Femdom male re-education

When it comes to understanding what women want and need, it is certain that most men…

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Femdom Lifestyles has its first 200 followers on Tumbler.

What a testament for all those women leaders and the men and women who worship them!

Femdom Corporal Punishment

Corporal Punishment (CP) is defined by Wikipedia as a form of physical punishment that involves the deliberate infliction of pain as retribution for an offense, or for the purpose of disciplining or reforming a wrongdoer, or to deter attitudes or behavior deemed unacceptable. The term usually refers to methodically striking the offender with the open hand or with an implement, whether in judicial, domestic, or educational settings.

CP is similar in femdom, with the addition of a distinct sexual undercurrent and a healthy dose of humiliation.

In femdom, CP can be used as part of training the sub (male or female) to learn and accept his or her new role; disciplining him or her when caught doing something proscribed (like masturbation without permission), or even for entertainment (for the woman who have a little sadistic streak in her). 

As Wikipedia explains there are several ‘implements’ used in femdom CP. There is plain old spanking with the bare hand, which often hurts the hand of the woman meting out the punishment. But for the woman who wants to spare her hand, there is a large range of implements of punishment that includes, rulers, wooden spoons, spatulas, paddles (ping pong or sorority paddles are some examples), canes (specially made for ‘caning’), riding crops, belts and even whips.

The methods of punishments can vary greatly as well, depending on the reason for the punishment and the woman’s whims. To be most effective, the sub should be naked (or at least with a bare ass), and made to get in a certain vulnerable and humiliating pose to receive his or her punishment. A ceremonial air helps the punishment achieve a certain authoritarian position for the woman carrying out the punishment, and increases the humiliation for the receiver.

Although there is a degree of BDSM in CP, it can often be a sensuous experience, or at least sexual. This is particularly true if sexual humiliation is added to the ceremony.

In some cases, the sub may actually experience ‘sub space’, a response that is similar in intensity to orgasm but is not necessarily sexual. This ‘sub space’ experience truly is a BDSM experience, but in a female led relationship can help solidify the woman’s domination over her sub. Having had this experience twice, I can say it is truly a mind blowing experience….

Femdom Corporal Punishment

Femdom Corporal Punishment

Corporal Punishment (CP) is defined by Wikipedia as a…

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Advice from a woman…
femdomhotwifecuckoldinterracial:

The Anal Experience for Men
Because of certain religious and cultural taboos, it’s extremely difficult for most masculine heterosexual men to admit that they like having something put in their ass.
It’s like there’s a graduated intensity ranking for them that goes more or less like this…
… a finger (it’s surprising to them, but can be okay as long as it’s their wife or girlfriend doing it; and if you can learn how to stimulate his prostate and make him instantly ejaculate, he’ll learn to love it)
… a dildo or a vibrator (you’ve got to work up to this with a guy; it helps if you first let him use it on you, and then kind of joke with him "okay, baby, now it’s your turn"; it also helps if you get him a little drunk; you have to go small/thin at first or you’ll hurt him and it will be a bad experience for him; if you want to go bigger/thicker, do so gradually, and always use lots of lube; don’t ever ask him if he wants to do this, or if he’s ready, or whatever, because his sense of heterosexual masculinity won’t allow him to admit it; instead, just do it, and go with the feeling; if he starts to move back against it, gyrates his hips, and moan… he’s liking it)
… getting fucked by a woman with a strap-on (it takes a really long time and a lot of patience to work up to this; getting him a little drunk helps; again, you have to go small/thin at first and slowly graduate to bigger/thicker; you have to ‘reward’ him afterwards in a major way; the way I did it… I’d strap him for a while, then I’d have him lay on his back, get on top, and fuck his little dick off; by giving him the fucking of his life after I strapped him, he began to associate getting strapped with great mind-blowing orgasms; once it happens, though, once you take him anally, it will totally change the dynamics of the relationship; if you start to fuck him with a strap-on regularly (which often happens because for women it can feel beautifully empowering and become somewhat addicting), it will inevitably change how you look and think of him; it will also start to change how he feels and thinks of himself; personally, I wanted to intensify these feelings in him, which is why after a while I started to tease him by referring to his ass as a “little bitch hole”, and would sometimes call it a “boy pussy”; I also decided to share with a few of my closest girlfriends that my hubby gets the strap-on, and made sure that he knew that they knew.)

Advice from a woman…

femdomhotwifecuckoldinterracial:

The Anal Experience for Men

Because of certain religious and cultural taboos, it’s extremely difficult for most masculine heterosexual men to admit that they like having something put in their ass.

It’s like there’s a graduated intensity ranking for them that goes more or less like this…

a finger (it’s surprising to them, but can be okay as long as it’s their wife or girlfriend doing it; and if you can learn how to stimulate his prostate and make him instantly ejaculate, he’ll learn to love it)

a dildo or a vibrator (you’ve got to work up to this with a guy; it helps if you first let him use it on you, and then kind of joke with him "okay, baby, now it’s your turn"; it also helps if you get him a little drunk; you have to go small/thin at first or you’ll hurt him and it will be a bad experience for him; if you want to go bigger/thicker, do so gradually, and always use lots of lube; don’t ever ask him if he wants to do this, or if he’s ready, or whatever, because his sense of heterosexual masculinity won’t allow him to admit it; instead, just do it, and go with the feeling; if he starts to move back against it, gyrates his hips, and moan… he’s liking it)

getting fucked by a woman with a strap-on (it takes a really long time and a lot of patience to work up to this; getting him a little drunk helps; again, you have to go small/thin at first and slowly graduate to bigger/thicker; you have to ‘reward’ him afterwards in a major way; the way I did it… I’d strap him for a while, then I’d have him lay on his back, get on top, and fuck his little dick off; by giving him the fucking of his life after I strapped him, he began to associate getting strapped with great mind-blowing orgasms; once it happens, though, once you take him anally, it will totally change the dynamics of the relationship; if you start to fuck him with a strap-on regularly (which often happens because for women it can feel beautifully empowering and become somewhat addicting), it will inevitably change how you look and think of him; it will also start to change how he feels and thinks of himself; personally, I wanted to intensify these feelings in him, which is why after a while I started to tease him by referring to his ass as a “little bitch hole”, and would sometimes call it a “boy pussy”; I also decided to share with a few of my closest girlfriends that my hubby gets the strap-on, and made sure that he knew that they knew.)

(via mistresslittleblog)

An Orgasm-Denial Manual for Women

This is a manual posted on Tumblr. Not sure if it was written by a man or a woman…

An…

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CFNM- Clothed Females Nude Males

If Femdom is the redefinition of the sexual hierarchy (women rule / men serve), CFNM is the…

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CBT (Cock and Ball Torture)

Cock and Ball Torture, more commonly known as CBT, is where femdom meets S&M (Sadism and Masochism).

There are many ways a woman can practice CBT- ranging from ‘penis whipping’ to sounding (urethral invasion), to electro-shock, to ‘ball busting’. Other less dramatic examples of CBT (not pictured) may include male chastity devices, scrotal weights and clips or piercings of various types.

Unlike most other aspects of Femdom, the woman or women involved in CBT need to enjoy sadism. Except for male chastity devices where the ‘sadism’ is mainly in ‘orgasm denial’ and a form of temporary castration, most of the other aspects of CBT involve some degree of physical (if not emotional) pain.

Despite this pain, most forms of CBT also give the man some degree of sexual stimulation! In fact many times, practices like penis whipping and elecro-shock end with an intense orgasm for the man- resulting in his being confused over the difference between what is pain and what is pleasure that his woman is inflicting. It is the ultimate definition of masochism; and CBT appears to make converts even of men who did not know they were masochists.

Sexual Humiliation:

One of the most pervasive passion that runs through all aspects of femdom is humiliation. There seems to be countless forms of humiliation in femdom, but the common thread involves breaking the man’s ingrained sexual ego. For this reason, unlike other forms of humiliation, the humiliation in female domination (whether it is social, domestic or sexual) has a strong undercurrent of sexuality.

Sometimes the humiliation may arise from directly making fun of the man’s penis size or questioning his sexual ability. Sometimes it arises when the woman questions his masculinity, and/or makes him dress up in women’s clothing as confirmation of his lack of manhood. Sometimes it may arise by demonstrating to the man how oversexed he is as the woman practices orgasm denial until he is begging for release. Sometimes it may arise from having to be spanked naked over the woman’s lap like a misbehaving schoolboy, or be made to assume a submissive and vulnerable position for a paddling (perhaps in front of a few women as in a couple of the pictures above). Sometimes it may come from having to kiss (and adore) the woman’s feet- as if this is the only thing he is good for; or having to walk around with a dog collar (or even a cock leash…). Sometimes it arises as women abuse the groveling naked man in public, or force him to masturbate while kneeling at their feet.

But probably the most humiliating practice in femdom (at least for me), is being taken by a woman’s strap-on dildo (also called pegging). Pegging is discussed in detail here. In addition to it being a reversal of sexual roles, it completely alters the man’s deeply ingrained ideal of his own masculinity- one where he is always in sexual control; and as he assumes the submissive position for his woman and feels her dildo invading him beyond his control, the humiliation is profound…

But the woman who might be worried that these acts are mean, must remember that the man undergoing these indignities often finds that the humiliation the woman caused him, arouses an inexplicable strong erotic feeling deep in his libido. It is a feeling like no other sexual feeling, one of extreme emotion and surrender: Feelings that men do not often feel, especially sexually. This is especially true with pegging and why it often results in very intense orgasm for the man.

Finally, when a man gets aroused at the prospect of getting spanked or paddled, it is not because he loves the pain- it is because of the sexual humiliation he must endure- especially if done in the right context.

I am not sure how humiliation works for the woman, whether dominant or submissive, so I welcome any comments from our readers…

Pegging:

Few aspects of femdom are potentially as powerful and role defining as the practice of pegging: taking the man up the anus with a strap-on dildo. Physically, pegging can be done in many positions but are usually performed ‘doggy style’ or in the missionary position.

At its very basic, pegging is simply sexual role reversal, with the woman becoming the sexual dominant and invading the anus of the now sexually submissive male. But, at least for the man, there is much more to it…

For a heterosexual male like myself, the idea of being taken up the ass by a woman is the epitome of humiliation. It is not just the discomfort (which is similar to passing a large hard turd), but it is also the complete loss of control; something that many heterosexual men are not used to. It is counter to all the ideals of masculinity that both men and women have been raised to accept.
The humiliation is often compounded by the fact that the dildo frequently stimulates the man’s prostate (that has sometimes been called the ‘male g-spot’), which not only may stimulate an intense feeling of ‘pleasurable discomfort’, but under the right circumstances, force an ejaculation and orgasm- that even can be involuntary. This involuntary phenomenon can be made even more certain if the woman uses a vibrating dildo to stimulate the prostate (and herself).  

Yet, despite the discomfort and the humiliation- the experience is extremely arousing for the man- and if the man is brought to orgasm- it is one of the most intense. Why such an experience would be so arousing is difficult to say (and I am sure that not every man would feel aroused by this), but a large part of it is the man’s total loss of control and the ceremonial consummation of his total submission to the woman.

In addition to the physical stimulation that the woman may get from the dildo, I have been told that there is also a powerful feeling of sexual control over the man.

A female reader, ‘M’ (milkyandthegentlemen.tumblr.com),  who has become a fan of pegging writes in response:

It’s too bad that some people feel this act of love is humiliating.  And that they describe it so inelegantly as “similar to passing a large hard turd.”  What utter bollocks that is.  At least, it’s not true if I’m doing it.  Or if Ruby Ryder and other women I know are caring lovers are doing it.  It’s marvelous.  Mind blowing.  Intense. 

To call this act “invading the anus” implies that any penetrative sex is an invasion, which is bullshit.  It’s slipping under your partner’s skin, going deep within him or her, stirring your lover to new heights.  It’s a union.  Are French kisses “invading the mouth”?  Sheesh.

The person who’s going to be pegged needs to prepare for it.  And to be prepared.  Clean out with an enema.  He or she can wear a butt plug to stretch the anus.  And one must use lube.  Lots and lots of lube.  I really like to rim my lover first, to lick and suck and make him feel wonderful and relaxed.  Then I can lube my fingers and have at him.  One, two, three.  Massage the prostate, get him ready for the main event.  Begin with a small shecock and then change it out for a larger size.  Slip in gently, then begin to thrust once it’s clear he’s enjoying it.  If it’s done right, it shouldn’t be painful.  It should be pure pleasure.

Just because the woman has strapped on doesn’t mean she forgets about the rest of sexual pleasure.  I touch and stroke my men.  And in one very special case, I kissed him thoroughly as I buggered his ass. 

I suppose I understand this part: “but it is also the complete loss of control; something that many heterosexual men are not used to. It is counter to all the ideals of masculinity that we have been raised to accept.”  When I first contemplated pegging, it alarmed me a bit because it was the complete assumption of control, something many straight women of my era aren’t used to.  It felt very unfeminine.  But I got over it as I saw beautiful women in lovely corsets and other outfits smiling gently, having at their fellas.

Sure, this can be done meanly, degrading a guy.  But that’s not an inherent part of pegging.  I object to it being portrayed as something humiliating.  It is a great act of love, giving a man the chance to see how nice it is to be filled, how fun it is to get fucked.

From Boardroom to Bedroom

I believe that ‘Femdom’ can be divided into three areas: Social, Domestic and Sexual.

‘Soci…

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Cuckolding:

The practice of having sex with another man (or woman) in the presence of, or with the knowledge of, the cuckolded man. This is NOT like ‘having an affair’, because the woman’s relations with her cuckold is usually more close and intense than she has with the ‘other’ man or woman.

This aspect of Femdom is possibly the most psychologically complex. I cannot speak from the woman’s point (I hope some of the readers can help), but I suspect that the practice gives her a feeling of sexual power and independence. I also believe that there must be some degree of sexual (as opposed to physical) sadism toward her cuckold. This is not hate for her sub- in fact, I believe it is far from it…

I also cannot truly speak from the cuckold’s point of view, since I do not fancy myself as one, but I suspect that he must have a healthy degree of sexual masochism (to complement his woman’s sexual sadism). I suspect that the man enjoys the humiliation of the perception (and demonstration) of sexual inadequacy to his woman.

Excellent Femdom Resource site!

I have just discovered a great website devoted to everything Femdom: http://www.femdom-resource.com/

Male Chastity Devices:

There are many types of male chastity devices (MCDs) available to the female who wants to control her man. They have many uses including orgasm control, punishment and humiliation. Here are pictures of 4 general types of MCDs.

The top row demonstrates a male chastity belt that completely covers the man’s penis. It is interesting to note that even though the front completely covers the penis, the back of the belt has a convenient hole, probably for dildo or butt plug placement.

The second row shows two versions of a penis ‘cage’. These devices generally have three functions- to prevent the man from getting an erection, prevent him from using his penis in sex and, in some cases, also prevent his penis from being touched (to prevent masturbation or other forms of release). Most types have a lock- and the woman gets to keep the key after it is locked.

The third row shows two versions of a urethral ‘plug’. These are designed to be pushed down the penile urethra (the hole) and act both to prevent erections and prevent (or control) ejaculation. It is quite uncomfortable (even painful) for the man.

The bottom row shows hybrid versions of the cage and plug. There are many versions of these including ones with ‘hollow plugs’ with a core that can be removed (for urination etc.).

Many other devices exist and I am sure many women can add their favorite device.